What Happened to You? by Bruce D. Perry and Oprah Winfrey
Change the question from "what's wrong with you?" to "what happened to you?" and behavior that looked like a character flaw starts to look like an adaptation.
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Open in SpotifyHave you ever judged someone's behavior before knowing their story? In this episode, let's delve into the book "What Happened to You? Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing" by Bruce Perry and Oprah Winfrey, which explores how trauma and relationships shape the way we experience the world!
The brain organizes around early experience; later behavior makes sense in that light.
Regulate, relate, reason: you cannot reason with someone, including yourself, who is not regulated.
Relationships are the most powerful healing tool there is.
Next time you judge yourself for a reaction, ask "what happened to me that made this make sense?"
“What happened to me that explains a reaction I usually criticize myself for?”
Write about itYou cannot reason with a nervous system that is not calm yet.
Use it when
You or someone else is flooded and words are not landing.